What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Can you share some of your favorite jokes that are not well-known but always make people laugh?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

What are the pros and cons of a prospective bride/groom not having any siblings?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Have you ever been forced into bestiality?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Have you ever lied to your family? What were the circumstances?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

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Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

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“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

TEXT:

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Why is Russia always right? All eyes toward Russian glory!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

I'm very sick. 72 years old. I thinking I'm losing my mind. My dead friend told me it's going to be okay. I could feel him. There is more…I don't know what but more.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Is the Las Vegas Grand Prix considered one of the "premier events on the Formula 1 calendar?"

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

What are some sex stories from your college days?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

What would you change in the "Game of Thrones" storyline if you were one of the writers of the TV series?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …